Dear New Moms…

Time and experience are wonderful teachers. So I asked some moms who have older children what they would like to go back and tell themselves when they first became mothers. New moms, you will want to pay attention to their answers!

“There is no way to be a perfect mom but a million ways to be a good one.” – Sabrina McConnell, mother of 2

“When you have a newborn, don’t be in a hurry to ‘get back to normal life.’ That is the ONLY time that you are not expected to do anything but take care of and bond with your baby. Rest, heal, bond, and take your time…Pay close attention to what is natural in your children when they are very young. It is generally what is most true about them and can be very helpful in understanding and guiding them…Find one or more mentor moms to walk the journey with you.” – Julie Albritton, mother of 6

“Enjoy every stage!” – Kacy Parks, mother of 2

“Trust yourself. You know better than anyone else what your child needs.” – Marci Williams, mother of 3

“You can’t do all the things. Don’t wear yourself out trying to do everything. What your kids need is you. They don’t need activities every night of the week.” – Sherry Wolfe, mother of 3

“Most everything is a phase that kids go through. Have patience. It doesn’t last long.” – Mauri Welzien, mother of 3

“Look at the advice of others as *possible* wisdom for your toolbox. It’s good to learn from others, but you’ll need to sort through that toolbox for the answers that are right for your child. You won’t need it all!…Kneel down, look in [their] eyes, listen. Obviously you can’t do this every single time your child wants to talk to you, but, sadly, it is possible to go through days and weeks and months without stopping and looking deeply into your child’s eyes and truly seeing them for who they are.” – Sherri Bowman, mother of 6

“Relax.” – Amanda McCormick, mother of 3

“Give [your]self grace and stop trying to be ‘perfect.’ Just be the best mom [you] can be for [your] kids without anyone else’s opinions impacting what [you] do.” – Tracie James, mother of 2

“Laugh more. A lot more.” – Joy Dowdle, mother of 3

“Somehow make a daily quiet time with your spouse so that the children grow up expecting it and cooperate.” – Michele Morris, mother of 4

“Live in the moment. Keep a notebook and write down cute things that happen or words they say. You will forget.” – Paula Brown, mother of 1 

“Slow down and enjoy the quiet times at home. The hustle and bustle of ball games, extracurricular activities, school functions, and daily life eat away at those precious moments.” – Alicia Baham, mother of 2

“Shop at the consignment sales. You don’t need new everything.” – Eryn Lynn Fisher, mother of 3

“Take more videos of everyday life. I wish I had more of them so I could hear their little baby/toddler/preschool voices again. Also, call your doctor and tell her [if] you are sad or mad all the time. It isn’t normal, and you can be helped.” – Lauren Young, mother of 2

“Not everything has to be a teachable moment. A lot of moments are just to be enjoyed. Don’t take everything so seriously…Life has a way of teaching us all the things we need to know. Our kids aren’t projects that need to be fixed. They are gifts that we get to enjoy.” – Amy Rogers, mother of 3

“Keep an open line of communication with your kids always. Let them feel they can tell you anything and trust you with that information.” – Stephanie Powell, mother of 2

“Take lots and lots of videos. And not just of the big moments (their birthday parties, preschool recitals, etc) but the little day-to-day moments. The way they say good morning when you get them out of their crib, or when you catch your five-year-old dancing in the sprinkler in the backyard. When they’re making their toy train go ‘choo choo’ along the couch or singing along to the opening tunes of their favorite cartoon. Being able to go back and hear their little voices and revisit those simple moments will be gold to you when they’re older. They seem like such small, mundane parts of daily life when you’re living through them, but you’ll treasure every moment of these moments you’ve captured when they’re older.” – Nicole Morgan, mother of 2

“Stop pushing your kids to achieve…If they are good at it, or really interested in it, they’ll pursue it on their own and improve naturally. And if they aren’t interested to that level or naturally gifted at it, it can create serious stress/grief for them. Especially if they feel like your love/approval are tied to their successes!…Give them opportunities to find their passions, to develop their abilities.” – Stacie Estes, mother of 20 (not a typo!)

“When you figure out a stage, it’s time for another that will stump you, so stay on your toes!” – Emily Mulhollen, mother of 2

“Prayer is the key. You will be a faithful parent because you want to honor God in your life, not because you have a guaranteed result. God alone can bring spiritual fruit in your child’s life; prayer means He gets all the glory, not you!” – Sunday Holmes, mother of 3

“Slow down; enjoy the cuddles, the fun moments; play with your kids!!” – Rachel Peterson, mother of 5

“Concentrate on joy.” – Sammie Jo Barstow, mother of 2