The Note

I don’t know about your children, but mine seem to think that going to the bank is all about getting suckers.  One day a few years ago, my son Caleb was going to accompany me on one of these trips to the bank, but first he asked for a piece of paper and a pencil.  Curious as to where this was going, I asked Caleb why he needed these supplies.  “Cuuuuz,” he replied shyly.  Then with pencil and paper in hand, he started asking me how to spell different words.  After guiding him through the word formations, this is what the note said:

“Do you have any suckers?”

So I had to ask.  “What are we going to do with this note, Caleb?”

“We’re gonna give it to the lady at the bank,” he said.

I didn’t really know how to explain to my young son that walking up to a bank teller and handing her a note is not a good idea and not something I was about to do.  But maybe I’ve seen too many movies.  My imagination went straight to handing the lady the note, her hitting the  silent alarm button, and me standing there with my preschooler, surrounded by policemen with guns pointed at us.  “All we wanted was a sucker,” I’d say with my hands in the air.  “Likely story, lady.  Now move it!,” the officer would reply.

Okay, so I have seen too many movies.

As silly as this scenario is, it is still a reminder to me that we as parents have a responsibility to teach our children how to communicate with people.  In this case, Caleb was just really shy and preferred writing a note to the lady.  As a writer and fellow introvert, I could completely empathize with him!  However, it is important for me to teach him how to relate to others–to be able to have face-to-face conversations, even when it is difficult.

This is a lesson I am continually learning in my own life.  In this age of digital dialogue, it is becoming all too easy not to have to actually communicate using one’s own voice.  We can do pretty much everything we need to do through e-mail, Facebook, Twitter, and texting.  My introversion loves this, but I also realize that it’s not healthy to rely completely on these.

I don’t want to become lazy in the ways that I communicate with others, and I don’t want my children to miss out on the art of having a conversation with another human being, even if it means pushing themselves beyond their comfort zone.

Let’s set a good example for our children in how we interact with others.  Let them see us talking to people, not just passing notes.